Of course, I am not Guglielmo Marconi, who, on 13 May 1897, sent the world’s first radio message across open water: “CAN YOU HEAR ME?” However, I’ve been feeling almost wireless lately due to the extensive renovation planned (by my wife!) for this entire week, which was supposed to happen immediately and has turned everything upside down. My only connection was my cell phone, which I could hardly do anything with.
I don’t mind renovations; I just need a heads-up to prepare for them. Although I must admit that my office, where I sit and write, was neglected for thirteen years and was covered in dust! In addition to computer equipment, I have many instruments, such as guitars, amplifiers, effects, music player devices, etc. There was suddenly a tangle of cables, and due to the dust of the past thirteen years, the view of the empty spaces was unpleasant. Nevertheless, it had to be done. Now, I’m so exhausted that I don’t have the energy to continue my regular work. However, I have to share with you that aside from my muscle pain, I also feel a deep emotional pain that I need to work through because I ended up throwing away a significant memory of my brother, Al.
The theme is not only about letting go of old things, but it also highlights Al’s remarkable effort and hard work in collecting cinematic masterpieces. Al has carefully recorded over five hundred video cassettes (VHS, with the capacity of three or four movies, each cassette; Long Play recording), containing many excellent works by great directors like Stanley Kubrick, Alfred Hitchcock, Martin Scorsese, Akira Kurosawa, Steven Spielberg, Billy Wilder, Federico Fellini, Francis Ford Coppola, Orson Welles, Ingmar Bergman, Howard Hawks, Jean-Luc Godard, David Lean, John Huston, John Ford, Fritz Lang, FranΓ§ois Truffaut, Charlie Chaplin, James Cameron, Clint Eastwood, Buster Keaton, MiloΕ‘ Forman, Sergio Leone, Luis BuΓ±uel, Vittorio De Sica, Sam Peckinpah, Ernst Lubitsch, Elia Kazan, Michael Curtiz, Michelangelo Antonioni, Nicholas Ray, Roman Polanski, Sidney Lumet, Frank Capra, William Wyler, Joel Coen, Robert Altman, Oliver Stone, Otto Preminger, Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, Terry Gilliam, Bernardo Bertolucci, George Lucas, Luchino Viscontiβ¦ are you still there?!
I was working six days a week, and my desire was that when I retired, we could both enjoy sitting and watching all these good movies together. But Al’s earlier departure and the rapid advancement of technique overtook my wish to fulfil this dream. That’s why, with all my pain, I decided to give up his outstanding work and throw away all these videos I have held onto for twenty years. I don’t know if anyone understands how deeply this decision hurt me.
Finally, the only thing that can calm my suffering is this fascinating and profound Tibetan ritual, which helps me understand that everything has no worth! There is a time to build and a Time To Destroy; nothing lasts forever! Heartfelt thanks, everybody.
The illustration at the top is by Tim Cordell.
lampmagician 
Wow that’s an incredible collection to let go of Aladin – I do understand the weariness and sadness that comes with letting go of something that represented your hopes of good memories being made with your brother. It cuts deep and can only heal over time, so do rest and nurture yourself whilst your healing takes place. The video of the sand mandala is beautiful, its message so true…nothing lasts forever and everything changes – its a hard lesson to learn sometimes. Sending love and light to you this weekend.
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I can’t add anything to your words as you got the point and seemed to have practised similar issues. There is a difference between people who keep and those who throw away immediately. Regina belongs to the latter group, and I am on the opposite side. But on this point, I just miss him and his presence. He was brilliant and curious about the internal communications. He just left too early at the beginning of these broad connections. Thank you, my lovely Lin. Have a great weekend with our beloved Deborah, and I wish her success.ππΉπ₯°π¦
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I donβt know why Aladin, but letting go of Alβs video tapes (with love, tis the best and only way) feels deeply liberating to me. From the dust and chaos of thirteen years comes order and calm as balance, above and below, is restored.
Numerology-wise, I canβt help but notice that the number thirteen is associated with the Divine Feminine. I wonder if this means something important to you? I also can’t help but note this release is the month before your big birthday!
As Iβm in the process of renovating my own life this year, I resonate deeply. Itβs not an easy place to be is it?! I hope and pray your shaken up world settles down over this summer. Creating more space may be what was needed.
What wonderful movies, music and so much more you have shared with Al. No wonder you write about movies so often. Lastly, like Lin wrote, the sand mandala is beautiful! Sending love and light across the ocean between us, Deborah.
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My lovely Deborah, it is a great honour for me to receive your thoughts between your challenges to create art (life). Oh yes! I love number thirteen because it brought me permanent luck: Feminine is life! And as you noticed well my dear wise friend, I am somewhat careless at my age. Therefore, the topic Let it go, has become more and more easier. Love and peace, my dear Angel. Thank you!πππ¦π¦πΉπΉππ
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I do understand how difficult it is to get rid of things you’ve saved for years because they mean so much. I’ve felt that too. Letting go of treasured objects that remind us of people we’ve loved, (or even beloved pets) is really tough. Even when you know no one will ever want or use them. Sometimes it feels like a betrayal, not only to those you loved, but also to your cherished memories of them. For me it’s also painful because it forces me to face the reality of my own passing and those I’ll be leaving behind.
But as you know, there’s much wisdom in Ecclesiastes 3. Especially verse 6 which says, there is “a time to search and a time to give up/a time to keep and a time to throw away.” Seeing it from this cosmic perspective, as “a season for every activity under the heavens”, helps me let go . . . but it’s never easy. My mother died 16 years ago and I still have a box of objects she couldn’t give away.
I’m impressed that you approached your task with such consciousness, determination, and resolution. May the knowledge that you did the right thing bring you peace.
Warm blessimgs, Jeanie
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My lovely teacher, your words bring me peace and calm my heart. You know precisely when I need advice, and there it is. I appreciate your awareness. Thank you so much. I must also add that the critical reason I regained the courage to accept the pain of getting away from this old treasure was my worry that when I was gone, my wife would have great stress removing all those things.
With special thanks for these wise biblical words from the Old Sageness, I wish you, my dear Jeane, a beautiful summer season. Love and peace.ππ€π
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I get it!
I have gone through something very similar, recently.
Physical things are merely that. Yes, they may evoke memories, but they themselves are not the memories.
Things may remind us of the love we have for someone, but they are not the love.
The love and memories are inside of each of us. Do we take them with us when we die? That I don’t know.
You have all the titles of the movies Al recorded. You can still watch all of those movies. Al recorded them to watch. So you will watch, just on a different format.
Sending love!
β¦πΉππ€
PS The sand Mandala is beautiful.
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That’s so true, my dear Resa. Al has listed and numbered all the films (about eight hundred) from A to Z. I can definitely find and watch them, but the movies aren’t that important, are they? We both inherited and learned about the world of cinema from our mother, and I will never forget those moments when I watched those films in his company; that is a wordless communication! About after we die, I think we will all carry those memories with us, maybe in a different form and for a different purpose. Thank you, as always, for your profound comment.
πππ₯°π¬π₯ππ¦
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I share our adorable friend Pam Lazos‘s endearing comment because she could not communicate it due to technical reasons. Thank you, Pam.πππ₯°
Oh my, Aladin, such complicated emotions. I still have my baby brother’s little christening cap and a few other little remembrances — he died at only three months old, but it really did a number on my family, one that rings on down through a lifetime — and so much stuff from my parents who are now both dead, but over the years I’ve managed to release more and more into the world and let go of the “things” so I can just keep the memories and attempt to soothe my complicated relationship with death. Even as a 3-yr.-old, I became very acquainted with death and feel as though death sits on my shoulder more days than I’d care to say. It’s horrible, losing someone so close to you, but I’ve had enough metaphysical experiences to know that death is a sham; your loved one is still there, albeit in a form that we as humans don’t recognize, and you just have to have faith that you will be reunited in a better place. It doesn’t make the going any easier for this incarnation, but at least you know there’s light at the end of that long tunnel.
Which is why I love the monks!! They came to Millersville University in Central PA where I live around 2005 or so and built a sand mandala over the weekend and at the end of the day on Sunday, they poured all their beautiful work into the river! Listening to their resonant voices also felt a little like touching God — so thanks for sharing that video — and the best part is I got to expose my kids to all of it at a young age.
I, like you, have lost many people that I’ve loved and sometimes don’t know how to keep going, but the thing about life is, it’s stronger than death, and somewhere, maybe even in another galaxy, Al is rockin’ it and waiting for you to catch up.
Sending you an extra dose of love and light today, Aladin. xox
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I have some feeling of this pain after I finally let go of Vic’s library, including videos. I did that a few years ago and it still hurts. I’m glad I did it although I protested all the way–to myself because Vic had died 10 years before. I’m now in the middle of trimming down and redoing my website and that has eaten so much time and emotional energy, but there’s too much unused stuff on there. It’s an emotional and literary housecleaning and I find it disorienting. I face the fact that I resist change–and change happens anyway. As I read about Iran, I think of your emotional ties there. Be well and calm in this mad world.
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Oh yes, my dear Elaine. You know well how I felt about this enforcement. And yes, we must divide ourselves for beloved things and look forward, though there is not much time left. Thank you!
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