How Fragile We Are!

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I wasn’t sure if I wanted to write this story at first, but after reading the heartfelt verses of “So What” by my wise friend Mike Steeden, I felt encouraged enough to write it. Mike’s poem felt very familiar to me!

It is Tuesday, and I must write my usual weekend posts earlier because this coming weekend will be jam-packed with a mixture of moans and revel, grief and joy!! On Saturday, we (must) drive southwards to another town to participate in Regina’s sister’s birthday party. Still, the day before that, on Friday, there is the funeral of a 25-year-old young man, the son of a long-time close friend of my wife and me, who was found dead last week in his apartment.
Of course, this incident belongs to the inner circle of acquaintances, so I decided to preserve everyone’s anonymity. Unfortunately, similar stories occur frequently, but I believe this one is noteworthy due to specific details worth sharing.

I have known the mother of this boy since the early nineties; a beautiful girl and a close friend of my wife (still a girlfriend of mine at the time) with full wishes looking to the future. After a while, she married a bit older gentleman, with the dream of having a family with children. It didn’t happen because, after some medical research, they discovered that the required sperm were too slow to reach the egg. As a result, they decided to opt for using donor sperm from foreign donors (Artificial Insemination). When she talked to me about her decision, I shared my opinion and asked if it was important for her to specify the origin of the sperm, such as whether it belonged to a German donor or not. She let me enjoy her beautiful smile awhile and told me she preferred to take a pure German sample; she added that, in all honesty, she knew my son as cute and sweet (he was about nine those days) but very strenuous and demanding. She believed it was because of his mixed heritage, with me as a non-German and Regina as a German. So, she thought that a straight mix would give a better result!

Anyway, the child was born a very handsome boy, although the mother’s dream didn’t go as well as it should have. After a short time, the man lost his feelings toward his wife and, most of all, toward his non-son! The couple separated, and everyone went their own way. The man found another woman, and the woman first tried it alone, and after a short affair with my brother Al, married another man with two children. I didn’t get much information about the boy, but I did hear that Al believed the boy was a genius because of his strange behaviour; he could hear the boy banging his head on the wall at night! As the boy got older, he went to school and seemed to be doing fine. However, as he became a teenager, I found out from my wife that he became addicted to drugs.

I remember once she, the mother, confided in me about her despair and asked me if I could talk to him and tell him about my experiences with drugs and how I managed to quit. I did it, of course, even though I knew it would never work because every addicted person has their own way of being involved with this devil and must find their own soul’s path to be rescued. I could only try to analyze it with his father complex, as he never had a good relationship with his non-father. Maybe it would be better if he knew the truth about his real father or how he himself has been made. That might be the reason why he never wanted to quit drugs.

Long story short, She had tried numerous methods to help her son overcome his addiction, visiting doctors, hospitals, and various aid institutions for healing. However, again and again, after a while, he relapsed, and the cycle continued, becoming a seemingly never-ending story. Till then, another purchase was a big plan to send him to a new version of quitting. He asked his mother to give him a sum for meeting his girlfriend in another town before he got to the hospital. She trusted him, but he repurchased some stuff, got into his apartment, and (apparently, as I believe) put an end to his sad story with a golden shot!

That was a short story about the brief life of a young man who was brought up into life with such great efforts and wishes, but he faded away as ado about nothing! As the holy books say, we humans are the highest of creatures, a confection of love, lust, greed, needs, and before all dreams, but so incredibly fragile!

Illustrations and paintings by Sky Black Art.

An addendum
Now, it is Friday, and I’m writing this after I return from the funeral; there was a vast audience I never expected. It made me mirthful, and I do believe if the boy knew to have so many fans would choose another way! I send my heartfelt blessing to his soul.🙁😐💖

PS: And as I reached Saturday today, I must hurry to the birthday party. It seems like I’m playing a part in the movie “Four Weddings and a Funeral”! Tomorrow, there’s another planned event: the communion celebration for my daughter-in-law’s sister, but that’s another story!!😜

30 thoughts on “How Fragile We Are!”

  4. This is such an important story Aladin, so important that here it is on your website. This is what I call ‘soul food for others’ to slowly imbibe, chew and reflect on. I’m so sorry to hear this sad news my friend but know that your heart and soul just had to share it with us. I hope in doing so it brings you peace and this young man (from wherever he is now) knows how very much you and others loved him. All the love in my heart, Deborah. Xxx

    Liked by 3 people

    • These are profoundly touching words, my dearest Deborah. I would like to send them to him right away, as I know it will calm his heart. The only broken heart is his mother’s, with heavy pain lingering in and remaining until, as I told her, time does its healing process! Love to you, dear angel.💖🙏

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I’m so sorry to hear this beautifully written but sad story Aladin – I often wonder that when people are teetering at the fragile edge of their life, if they just had one more sleep on it and could see the love that surrounded them – if that might just stop them taking that very final step. It’s not coincidence that, to follow such a sobering event as the funeral, you should be attending uplifting celebrations to bring your world back into balance and see the love around you.

    Liked by 2 people

    • You raised an important point about recognizing the love that surrounds us. It demonstrates that we may not realize how deeply we are loved or the strength of love itself. It’s sad when this goes unnoticed and such unfortunate things happen. And yes, I did experience a mix of emotions that weekend, but I’m still alive! Thank you.💖🙏😘

      Liked by 1 person

  11. As unique as each individual’s tale is, the story of drug addiction is a common beast.

    This is an unfortunate story. I hope he has his peace, now, because he had none in life.

    You are right, it is up to the individual to find the place of positive change within themselves, the honesty to themselves that they will be straight. Then, we can help them.

    It’s hard. Many I know who made the switch, and got off hard drugs, are now vicious cigarette smokers.

    Still, it is a lesser evil crutch.

    My condolences, Aladin!

    ☆❦🌹🌟🎨🌸💓

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, my dear wise Resa. After five years back then, Al and I got to save us, and I think we have had to find the darkest corners in our souls to give light with music and literature. One must be lucky, right?
      His soul is at peace, for sure.🙏🦋💖🕊

      Like

  13. Luciana Cavallaro's avatar Luciana Cavallaro

    What a terrible loss for your friend of the issues her son had experienced. Nothing is more difficult than seeing your child go though life with afflictions and not able to help them. My heart goes out her.

    Liked by 1 person

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